Ugh! Spammers!

I will do my best to keep Spam from bothering any readers here. I don’t allow third party posts, I’m the only author here, but I do permit moderated comments. Should someone successfully compromise this site please let me know and I will do what I can to get rid of the problem.

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Fox News Just Violated Me!


YES! I have been VIOLATED! And I will go into all the sordid details of the event right here.

When I start my computer I usually end up with Thunderbird and a web browser quietly running away on the desktop. Today TB was minimized and IE was active on the desktop with CNN, MSNBC, Fox, and Omaha.com open in separate tabs. CNN was on top.

I had turned aside to challenge the LA Times daily crossword when a melodious voice speaking of “Mom’s Bunghole Lube” (I hope that’s a fictitious product.) burst forth upon my solitude. What The Heck???…. After grabbing the volume control and obtaining a less than painful audio level it took me almost a minute to figure out that this was a video snippet running on the Fox News home page. I had to whack a teeny mute button a couple of times but ultimately the noise went away.

Having regained a modicum of silence I went back to my crossword only to shortly be subjected to an annoying voice crooning the the benefits of “Dad’s Knee Lint Remover”. (Again, my apologies if that’s a real product.) Once more it was Fox News and I was forced to chase that elusive mute button to make it go away.

Mind that I’m all for the free enterprise system of doing things. If I visit a web site I expect to be presented with opportunities to purchase things I neither need nor want. If I click on a video I will even sit through a 15 second commercial before it starts (I will not sit through a commercial that lasts any longer than that though! Take note CNN!) However, I draw the line at being repeatedly pummeled by voices emanating from pages that aren’t even being actively perused.

I refuse to be forced to consume commercial messages against my will. I want my advertisements delivered as they are in a newspaper or magazine — if they are there and if I’m interested I may look at them, otherwise they don’t intrude on my visit either aurally or visually. ADVERTISERS TAKE NOTE! — If you pop up, flash, rotate, change color, sound off, or otherwise interfere with my main purpose for visiting a web page you are only going to piss me off! As you can guess, that is not going to leave me inclined to purchase your product.

But, you say, we are continuously bombarded by useless advertising on both TV and radio! True, but both media have an aural component that we expect to be there and which often becomes an unnoticed part of the background. I usually surf the web in silence, or at most have a quiet audio track running in the background. I don’t expect to be surprised by unwanted audio input. I also do a lot of my browsing when everyone else is asleep, unexpected aural intrusions are not received well in this circumstance.

So, Fox News has forsaken its place of honor among my browser tabs, they have lost a viewer of more than two years duration because they chose to irritate rather than inform. And I would caution the rest of the world out there clamoring for the attention of myself and my browser — We are a fickle lot, we consumers; especially we WEB consumers! We want what we want, when we want it and we don’t want a lot of stuff we didn’t ask for! Press us a little too hard and we go elsewhere, and there are certainly a whole lot of elsewheres to visit on the web.

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It’s A Question Of Outgo!

Like most people I took a pay cut when I retired. How do I deal with making a lot less money? What am I not able to do? Am I going to be able to live within my means?

There are a lot fewer things I have to do. — Because I’m not at work all my time is mine. By that I mean I don’t feel pressured to find something to occupy me when I’m not actively doing something. Although I liked working, the time wasn’t mine, it belonged to someone else and thus was filled with things I felt obligated to do but which weren’t necessarily enjoyable. With so much time spent working or spent thinking about working I thought it was necessary to fill my down time with interesting, useful things to do, to stay busy.

The first few retirement months were spent weaning myself from being busy. I felt the need to be in motion, doing things, going places. After a couple of months I began to repeat places and activities and I soon came to understand that, with the passing of the initial novelty, I wasn’t really all that interested in most of them.

Gotta Go — I and my wife were going out for meals 5 and 6 times a week. Not only was that expensive, I really didn’t enjoy the food experience as much as one should (although I enjoyed the time with my wife). I found I got a lot more pleasure out of fixing those same meals at home myself. There were no time pressures and I preferred getting the flavors and textures exactly the way I wanted them.

We discovered there were very few other places we wanted to visit and most of those were one time events, never to be repeated, or not soon repeated.

Gotta Buy — I soon wondered why I was cruising the aisles at BestBuy and Nebraska Furniture Mart. I really didn’t need anything and I wasn’t finding anything that sparked my interest. So, unless I really need something (that I usually qualify by surfing the WEB first) I just don’t go window shopping very often.

Further, when I took the time to look around the house I discovered we usually already had something pretty close to whatever it was we were wishing for. I now know I have two battery operated hammer drills and five almost brand new caulking guns. In addition we have enough peanut butter to last us 15 or 16 months.

Gotta Spend — I have the ability to spend every dollar I start the day with and yet end up with absolutely nothing to show for it by the time I arrive home (not even receipts)! I highly recommend putting yourself and your spouse on a weekly allowance you can both live with. While this may sound restrictive I get a perverse satisfaction when I’m able to play all the golf I want and can still afford Lottery tickets at the end of the week! Mind that this allowance is not for essentials, food, gas, and the like, but for the optional things we all want to do or have. This also causes us to save up for the more expensive things we want to buy periodically.

We have taken to trading in some of the things we have to get other things we want. A quick trip through our extensive home library ultimately netted us several hundred dollars at our local used book store. Surveying the games we never use permitted the purchase of a new release that’s actually being played.

Gotta Nothing!!! — There is nothing I’ve gotta do.

I read my magazines in the library and on the WEB. In doing so I don’t have piles of them sitting around or heading for the trash every month.

Cooking twice a week, when supplemented by the occasional large frozen pizza and some deli chicken with potato salad provides all the non-breakfast meals we need. And there’s nothing like a nuked potato, butter, sour cream, bacon bits and shredded cheese to hit the spot for a quick meal. Oh, don’t forget to sprinkle some freshly diced onion on that.

Our primary entertainment consists of a satellite TV feed with the mandatory DVR — time shifting and commercial jumping are obligatory for the spouse — and a broadband Internet connection. Sports, the Science Channel, Discovery, Golf, etc., are required and my wife has to have her reality shows. The Internet feed supports NetFlix and Hulu as well as casual surfing and general bumming around. With a WiFi hot spot permeating the whole house not being able to sleep is an iPad adventure while remaining comfortably in bed.

Believe it or not, with a little prior planning for the big stuff and devoting a couple of months for winding down from “having” to do things, one gradually finds there are not a lot of things that require Outgo. We now spend money on things we “want” to do. We both do things that don’t cost a lot simply because that’s what we enjoy doing. In the meantime we keep putting money in the bank against the next big purchase we either need or want to make.

Lastly, I had always complained about not having enough time to read all the things lying about nor having time for my absorbing but irritating book of 500 Sunday crossword puzzles. Guess what, neither of those activities cost a whole heck of a lot and both are very satisfying.

We have managed to settle into a satisfying batch of activities that keep us both interested and entertained. Of course we are not driven to see the world nor do we have particularly expensive tastes. So, for us (and me in particular) retirement is not expensive yet it still meets and completes our basic needs. At least that’s true today, we will just have to see what tomorrow brings.

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Immigration – An Incentive!

I believe the United States needs a constant influx of new thoughts, new ideas, new blood. Any organism or group that cuts itself off from its surrounding environment will ultimately whither and die. However, I also believe the United States has the right to select those things it will take unto itself, it has the right to filter out that which would make it weaker or that which would bring about unwanted change and to only accept that which makes it stronger or more capable.

By rule of law and through popular adherence to that rule of law we have created an economic and behavioral environment that is the envy of much of the rest of world and which is the penultimate destination or goal of a majority of its residents. The model the United States has adopted requires adherence to the underlying rule of law. Without that adherence the model no longer exists, the environment disappears, it becomes something else.

I am not prepared to argue how many others we allow into our environment, our little club, our life style. I don’t know who is more deserving and I can’t tell you when to close the door, when we have admitted a sufficient number. But I am prepared to argue that each and every one of them must have a deep, abiding respect for our “rule of law”.

Applicants who often spend years waiting for the “system” to let them legally enter the United States as a resident or citizen understand and respect that “rule of law” and I welcome them to our way of life and the opportunities it offers. They bring with them a strength of character that is both valued and needed in our society.

I submit that those who buck the system and illegally enter the United States neither respect nor understand our “rule of law” and I support every effort expended to remove them from among us. By their very action they demonstrate they do not want to be a part of our environment, our grand experiment, but rather that they don’t believe in it and only want to take from it.

Before you chastise me for being callus and uncaring, I defy anyone to prove that those who break the law to take from and diminish our way of life are any more deserving or needy than those who patiently work the system to lawfully adopt our way of life and strengthen it.

The reward for illegal entry to the United States must be expedited deportation to the place of origin and the opportunity to join the end of the application line for lawful entry.

The reward for application for legal entry to the United States must be expedited approval of that application and immediate placement in those vacancies created by the deportation of those who were here illegally.

Now there is incentive! There is demonstrated desire to participate in the rule of law.

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Thank A Soldier Today

When you are out and about and happen upon them take pause and thank a soldier, a policeman, a fireman, or a prison guard today. Walk over, proffer your hand, and say “Thank you for what you do. I appreciate it.” Parents, walk your children over and tell them, “This is one of the good guys. He (she) makes you safe because of what he does.”

Don’t worry if they’re shy or awkward or don’t know what to say. They are used to getting their recognition from their own ranks, from those who share their trials, their mutual bond. They don’t know how to act when a “civilian” takes notice, so they will be shy and fumble their words. But you need to know, even though they might not say it, your appreciation, your simple “thank you” is important and they will carry it away with them.

Don’t be afraid to meet those who have made the choice to quietly serve and protect, those who do those things the rest of us shy away from, those who safeguard what we believe and enjoy. They are not “them”, they are “us”, and while they will be embarrassed by the attention, the recognition, go out of your way and let them know that you are aware of what they do and that you’re glad they are doing it.

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Parking In The Fire Lane!

I ran into a major traffic jam in the parking lot of my local grocery store the other day. There were 15/16 cars halted directly in front of the main entrance and nobody could seem to figure out what to do next. I finally got to my favorite spot “away” from the store, parked, and headed in to do my little bit of shopping. On the way I discovered the root cause of the traffic problem, there was an upscale Audi parked in the pedestrian crosswalk directly in front of the main entrance to the store. The driver’s seat was empty and in the passenger seat was a yuppie looking young lady (daughter?) madly texting away on a cell phone.

Not being in any particular hurry, I plopped down on a bench beside the entryway to see what would come of this. The jostling and jiggling of the traffic continued for the next 13 minutes and 28 seconds accompanied by hand waving, vocalizations, and horn honking. Ultimately, a very yuppie, well kempt, mid-aged woman (mother?) strolled out of the store and alit in the Audi. I don’t know what she had been doing inside the store, but she wasn’t carrying anything other than a small purse and certainly didn’t look handicapped. She calmly started her car and drove off apparently completely oblivious to the irritation she had caused several dozens of people who had just wanted to go to the store.

This “Bimbo” had blocked a pedestrian crosswalk, two lanes of traffic, and a plainly posted fire lane because she obviously was too privileged and lazy to walk 50 feet from a real parking space to the store. “Class” is not a matter of how you’re dressed or what you own, it is a matter of what you do and how you treat others. Apparently this woman is, in her own mind, so important that the inconvenience she causes the rest of us “little people” is of no consequence.

I was mildly irritated and momentarily inclined to say something rude to this “cow” but was diverted by the realization that whatever I had to say would be to no effect and of little utility. I imagined explaining the wonder of opera to one or more of the bovines kept on my neighbor’s farm. I’m sure both the reaction and level of understanding would be comparable in both cases.

My only regret was the lesson or lessons the young lady in the car would take away from this event. Of course I’m assuming she was not as self centered and oblivious as her companion. I have always been faulted for being nicer to people than they deserve.

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Me And My iPad.

Yes, I am an Engineer and, yes, I bought an iPad. Although I’m an engineer I’m not a fanatic about it. I have found the iPad to be ideal for what I want it to do.
1. It’s the right size. It is not as big nor heavy as a laptop but not as small as a PDA or phone. It’s easy to carry, has decent battery life, and the screen is sharp, big, and in glorious color.
2. It is instant on! I don’t have to wait several minutes for a boot cycle, I just push the button and it’s alive. In addition it is exactly where it was when I turned it off, ready to go.
3. Applications, applications, applications… I read books. I play games. I listen to music. I map out where I am and where I want to go. I find WiFi hot spots. I Email. I surf the WEB. I watch TV. I download movies. I calendar out my busy life.
4. It’s convenient. I take it with me around the house and when I’m out and around. I’m not going to write a novel on it, but I’m certainly able to do a ton of other things using a convenient, attractive package.
5. It’s everything all the PDA’s and laptops promised and never were.
My desktop unit is still my workhorse. I do the great majority of my design work and writing on it. But, my iPad increasingly does everything else to the extent that my laptops have become obsolete. I just don’t use them any more.
I am not an Apple fan, I am not a believer in or a holder of the faith. However I am an iPad fan. No matter what anyone else thinks the folks at Apple have pulled the real deal together into a complete, functional package and they did it at a price point that’s hard to ignore.

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What Do I Do Now?

  Having retired, what happens if I run out of things to do? And not necessarily just Mama’s to do list, but things I want to do. Thus far I don’t have any worries on that account.
  First off, I have learned that I don’t have to worry about sleep, I’m not on a fixed schedule anymore. If I’m not tired I stay up and do “things”. If I am tired I go to bed. It’s surprisingly hard to come to the realization that tomorrow isn’t going to be a bad day just because I can’t get to sleep tonight. Less hard to accommodate is the notion of a nap, 15-20 minutes in the recliner sometimes sets up the rest of the day.
  Secondly, some things just naturally repeat day after day. Getting up, making that first cup of coffee, watching the news, reading the paper, doing both crosswords (local & NYT) just seem to fit into the morning. I’m really surprised to discover that I like doing crossword puzzles, so much so that I have a book with 500 NYT Sunday puzzles in it and an iPad app that serves up 18 new and different puzzles each day (Many thanks to my dear wife).
  After coffee and the paper each day unwinds as it will… A trip to the store can be as long or short as I want it to be. I might spend the day working on the computer. Maybe I clean my clubs after a (walking) round of golf. A movie on Netflicks? Read a book – Kindle or real. Mow the grass. Shovel snow. Hang curtains. Make burritos for a late lunch. Basically, I let the day come to me, I don’t force it. Some days I don’t do anything. For the last 18 months that has seemed to be more than enough.
  I don’t have to “accomplish” anything and I don’t have anything to “prove”. I do owe it to myself and my spouse to make “me” happy and that is what I am doing. I will note this though, on occasion there is nothing that makes you feel quite as stupid as a New York Times Sunday Crossword Puzzle, and there is nothing quite as satisfying as finally solving one (even if you have to look up the answers).
  The bottom line — I simply live life. I don’t tussle with it or try to make it something it isn’t, I just accept it as it is. I have nothing to prove but a whole lot to enjoy. I don’t think I will soon run out of things to do… life won’t let me.

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Up And Running!

The WordPress Blog is up and evidently running on 14 Mar ’11. New posts to follow after I bring the old ones forward.

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Give Me My TV!

  All of the big “TV” providers are pushing products that let one “control” a Cable Box / DVR resident in the home using some other device connected to the Internet. You can program the box to make more recordings or you can have the box stream either recorded or live programming to whatever device you happen to have, wherever you happen to be.
Now that sounds nice but there are a couple of things wrong with it. What happens when you can only use a cellular connection? Slow, intermittent, and possibly expensive. What about streaming from your box at home? First of all you have to have the right equipment and connect it correctly – how many people do you know who can’t get their cable box and VCR/DVD Player talking with their TV? Secondly, what is the speed and reliability of your home upstream connection?
  I’ll tell you what I want – I want what I want when I want it. I want this giant warehouse of Video/TV that lets me pick what I want to see, when I want to see it, using whatever device I choose to do so. I’ll give you some instances…
  I have this giant, virtual video recorder somewhere out on the Web that I can set up record all the programs I’m interested in. When I have a suitable broadband connection this device downloads all these recorded programs either in bulk to my local device, say an iPad, so I can watch everything at my convenience whether I later have a broadband connection or not. Presuming I ultimately end up at home I want to be able to view those same programs on my various TV’s or possibly on my home computer. All of this is interchangeable and transparent. A good example of this kind of delivery is Kindle’s E-Books. No matter what device I choose to read them I’m always at the same page of the books I’m reading.
  I get home late and want to watch the local news which started 10 minutes ago. I open the channel guide, make my selection, and it’s just like I had never been late.
  I don’t want TV delivered to my home via cable and a bunch of specialized equipment. I want virtual, on-demand TV delivered to my home or wherever else I happen to be via a broadband Internet connection so that I can use any Internet/Network compatible device to view it. The Internet becomes the common carrier and the content is the virtualized, stored, product of the provider rather than a real-time data stream. That’s how I want my TV. …11/03/13

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The Challenge For The “Better Half”!

  Suffice to say my wife was not ready for this. She went from having 10/11 hours of sublime isolation during each of five days a week to no time alone at all. The ensuing overload tended to upset her a little bit (understatement noted). It is also important to note that things in the house I had never noticed before soon became major points of personal irritation. 
  My spouse was accustomed to being free to do whatever she wanted, whenever, especially around the house. Having me around the house put a crimp in those activities whether real or only perceived. It’s not that she actually  needed to do things differently but that she felt as though she needed to do so. Needless to say, this perceived intrusion on her freedom soon became a source of contention. 
  “Absence makes the heart grow fonder…” is not only an adage but a proven absolute around our house. My wife and I are basically loners by nature. We operate just fine with a minimum of interaction with others. With me gone at work for a good chunk of most days our “get together” time was both appreciated and needed. With me home every day there were some periods where we both just wanted to get away for awhile.
  When I was gone most of the day there were a goodly number of little things that I didn’t “see” or that I just dismissed from my conscious thought processes. Once homebound some of those same things became a source of near constant irritation. In addition, we tended to travel together every time we needed something outside the house. I am a “buyer”. I know what I want, I go in, get it, pay for it, and get out. I also, for the most part, tend to only purchase those things we actually need. My wife is a “shopper”. She likes perusing a good bit of the content of each and every store whether we intend to buy anything or not, she enjoys spending time while shopping. She also tends to purchase “goodies” above and beyond what we need or can use, e.g., we already have two kinds of bread and a package of cookies in the cart to which she will add a package of cinnamon twists, along with a bakery box of mixed apple fritters and eclairs. 
  We have both needed to accommodate to our partner’s differing needs. For example, when we go together I will gladly sit out in the car with my coffee and a good book while my spouse spends whatever unrushed time shopping. When she goes by herself she limits her purchases to only one trivial thing beyond what is truly needed. If it’s something big or expensive she calls.
Out of everything that has happened since that “magic” day making the adjustment(s) for new and in some cases upsetting personal/shared space issues has proved to be the most challenging and disaster prone. I’m glad to say we are finally managing it though. …03/13/11
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Why Did You Do That!

  There were several simultaneous happenstance’s that made it possible for me to retire:
  1. Paid Off Debt – We had gone to great effort over several years to get rid of all the debt we could. Car loans, credit cards, etc. The only thing we couldn’t touch was the house payment, but we had placed substantial down at purchase time and the monthly payment isn’t all that big.
  2. Relatively New Toys and Accessories – Our vehicles are very low mileage, under extended warranty, and only a few of years old. Our electronic goodies are two years old or newer and all our major appliances have at least another 10/15 years left in them. We had replaced all the major household systems (HVAC, water heater, windows, etc.) right after moving in. 
  3. Minimal Optional or Recurring Expenses – We had completed all our traveling and going while we were both in the military and there just isn’t a bucket list of things waiting to be done. Month to month expenses for two people living in a mid-size house are relatively low. 
  4. Guaranteed Income – I have two federal pensions I collect and my spouse will do the same in a few years. We have enough income to be frivolous on occasion while maintaining a sizeable emergency fund. 
  5. I have always had a burning desire to play so much golf that my hands would bleed.
  6. I suddenly realized that not only was I in a position where I could retire, I wanted to!
  Although the decision to retire was made rather abruptly (as far as my wife was concerned – more about that later) the lead-up to that decision point had spanned multiple years and required substantial planning and discipline. The key factor in making that decision was the realization that it was time to do so.
  I no longer looked forward to getting up and going to work and hadn’t for several years. The problem solving was no longer a challenge I looked forward to but a burden I increasingly dreaded. But I was conditioned by 40+ years of experience to continue the grind, meet and beat the enemy, be successful… I had to realize I was habituated. I was addicted to working just a surely as a smoker is addicted to cigarettes or a user to a drug. Once I became aware, making the choice to break the cycle was obvious, not easy, but obvious.
  The crux was to really consider the goals I had set for myself so many years ago illuminated by my current condition. I had intended to live the good life while doing everything necessary to be able to retire at a reasonable age. Well, I had lived as good a life as most people get and we were executing (or had executed) all the things necessary to set up the possibility of retirement. The only thing left to do was overcome the fear of making the decision. Yes, the “fear”. Although on the brink of that which I had always worked toward there was the fear of changing the status quo and jumping into the unknown. Even the most well executed plan eventually requires one to have enough courage to make the final decision, so I did. Golf here I come. …03/12/11
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The Plan!

  I would like to say my retirement came about exactly according to plan… I would like to say that! In fact it was fortuitous circumstance that proved to be the enabler.
  As is the case with many other people I had no real plans as I began my working career. I was working random jobs and using the proceeds to attend college with no particular major in mind. During one summer break I couldn’t earn enough money (a wildcat strike at a copper mine) and thus couldn’t go back to school for the fall semester. Being fully engaged in Viet Nam at the time it didn’t take Uncle Sam two weeks to reclassify me to OneA from TwoS and simultaneously provide me with a draft notice. I ultimately enlisted for four years to get the training I wanted along with choice of first station. And after 3⅔ years I finally realized I had found a career.
  In summary, I spent 14 years on active duty and another 12 years in the Army Reserve before going on the retired rolls. That meant I was entitled to half of my base military pay every month beginning the first month after I turned 60. It’s pretty nice to be in one’s mid forties and know there’s a guaranteed income waiting for you down the line.
  After active duty, the next 27 years were spent accumulating and disposing of various kinds and quantities of goods while enjoying the life provided by a second (dual) career as a electronic design engineer and part-time soldier. It was the good life and we enjoyed it.
  While satisfying, I find it difficult to classify any of the above as a plan. I was fortunate enough to make some good decisions as a young man and ended up just doing a series of things I happened to enjoy which ultimately left me pretty well off. Some plan, I think most would call it blind luck! …03/11/11

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Doing The Deed!

  As is typical of most things in life, I didn’t exactly get to pick my retirement date. Right after praising me for “Saving The Company” during an annual Board Meeting, my boss pulled me aside and told me to clean out my desk because my skills were “not a fit for what needs to be done”. This notice wasn’t exactly a surprise as other events had given me some warning and I had already passed through the various phases of loss.
  At some time during the last year of my employment I “got tired”. I was done, toast, didn’t want to participate, get out of my office and leave me the hell alone… While I still found the technical work interesting and rewarding I was tired of dealing with whiney, nasty people. Mind that these were all peers and above, not subordinates. I was tired of herding cats and only receiving a beating as a reward. The surprising part was that I hadn’t really began to come to grips with my “innards” until just a few weeks before I was let go.
I had plenty of transition time available and in a matter of ten days I had two job offers and one pending. However it wasn’t until I had the offers in-hand that the crisis struck… What was I doing? I had become so involved with thehabit of being employed that I had not considered whether I wanted to be employed. After taking a couple of days to think about it I knew I didn’t want to work for someone else again.
  This was a complete shock for my spouse and everyone who worked with me. I have always been driven by challenge, no one believed I would be able to leave my up-tempo environment and enter a life of doing nothing. I’m not sure I believed it myself but I certainly knew I couldn’t continue on the same path, something had to change. So, I rejected the offers and “did the deed” – I retired.
  Thus begins the real saga “Retired In Omaha”… …03/11/11
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Before The Deed!

  Unlike the preceding part of my career, the last few years before retirement were actually part of a predictive strategy. My long suffering spouse and I picked a geographic retirement location and then executed a loose plan to move us there along with most of our desired amenities. 
  We wanted four seasons and trees, a house big enough to hold our stuff, and a minimum of bills. We managed to acquire all that in the heart of the mid-West along with a new job that paid for the move and eliminated all of our standing expenses except for the mortgage. I will address this in greater detail later in this blog.
  So, the stage is set… …03/11/11
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The Vacuum Effect

  Driving down the highway heading for a Mexican Food lunch in the next town; the speed limit is 55 MPH and I, like everyone else, am traveling at 65 MPH. Soon I am slowed to 52 MPH by a medium sized Japanese car who’s driver is only recognized by the halo of grey hair framing the seat headrest. After several miles of a rocking-chair-like surging between 47 and 55 MPH we soon reach a section of road with a good long passing lane. Accelerate, flick the turn signal, pull out into the oncoming lane and watch first the trunk, then the passenger compartment, and finally the hood of the slower vehicle move backwards in my passenger side window. Steadily accelerating, I watch for the “Grey Panther” mobile to begin appearing in my rear view mirror; 65 MPH, 69 MPH, 72 MPH, still no car visible!
Quickly checking the passenger side mirror I note the Senior Citizen and his ride are glued to my right rear fender while a glance at my speedometer registers 77 MPH! I grab a much larger chunk of gas pedal and as I cross 90 MPH I finally see this race track wannabe appear behind me. Click the turn signal the other way, move back into the right lane, observe Grandpa and his ride rapidly move farther and farther behind me as I gradually slow to a “normal” 65 MPH.
  Knowing full well that no one would purposefully try to keep a passing car from getting around, I can only surmise that the “Geezermobile” somehow became trapped in the huge vacuum vortex I was dragging behind me, caused by failure to put my tailgate down into the approved horizontal position. My obvious negligence almost certainly caused this Knight of the local highways to be sucked along at terrifying speeds that both he and his vehicle had probably never seen heretofore.
  I briefly considered going back to apologize for my brutish behavior but, instead decided to go directly to the nearest auto parts store to purchase and install an open mesh tailgate to forestall visiting this terrifying event on any other unsuspecting Senior Citizen. Were we all as concerned for our fellow drivers there would be many fewer incidents upon our highways. 7/28/06

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Lemonade

  I saw a young boy today, he looked to be about 8 or 9 years old, most of his exposed skin was covered by scar tissue obviously caused by serious burns. I initially thought “How terrible” that this child is so disfigured and that he will have to live with this disability. He was talking a blue streak to the men he was with and soon had everyone around him chuckling about the content of his running dialog. His father, with a sly smile, joked that he had forgotten “to give him his pill” before taking him out in public. The young boy was up, down, talking, joking, and cajoling while engaging those around him eye to eye without a trace of fear or shyness. I soon came to realize that I had made a hasty judgment, in just a few minutes I was totally engaged with the bright and vibrant person he obviously was to the extent I didn’t notice the scars anymore, only a smart, healthy child fully immersed in the joy of life.
  People are only as handicapped as we are willing to make them or allow them to be. It’s wonderful that the people around this boy won’t let him be handicapped, that they are giving him the full joy of living. Life dealt him some lemons, but he not only made lemonade, he opened up an entire fruit stand for the rest of us to enjoy! I wish he had not suffered his obvious injuries, but I am still enjoying the smile he put on my face today. 7/21/06

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On What’s Important

  A co-worker had brought her young son into the office near the end of the workday and put him to work at some adolescent on-line games until it was time to go home. Nothing new here, and we were all glad to see him. About 20 minutes later this small child was pitching a king-sized fit. “I’m not going home… I’m staying here… No-o-o-ooo-ooooo!” What caused this outburst from this normally pleasant child? His mom had told him it was time to go and he didn’t want to leave his high-speed Internet connection in the office for the pokey dial-up connection at home. “I don’t want to go… Why can’t Dad fix it??? I….don’t….WANT….TO!!!!” Finally, his mom picked up her stuff and headed for the door, at-which-point-in-time I began to think I was going to get to baby sit a small child that I didn’t own. Fairly quickly the possibility of actually being left behind overcame his his bandwidth addiction and he stomped out with all the theatrics appropriate for a five year old having his limbs twisted, broken and finally ripped from his body.
  Before one rises to criticize the child or his mom, I have to point out that I am more than 10 times his age and would probably be at least three times as ugly given the same circumstances. And while I don’t usually condone bad behavior, any child who is both comfortable with and proficient at getting around the Internet is going to have a substantial head start on his peers that he will probably maintain for the rest of his life. The world is getting more and more technical and those who can embrace it, ultimately turn it to their needs and wants, are going to be the achievers, the leaders of the future.
Besides which, I can think of many other addictions much less pleasant or useful. Four young ladies grew up in my house and they all were addicted to charge cards and reliving the daily lives of each and every Soap Opera star on TV. Although they haven’t changed much, I still love ’em. 7/20/06

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The Lottery

  Why do people play the lottery? Everyone knows you stand a better chance of getting struck by lightning while dancing the Samba in your sister’s nightgown, twice, than making any kind of killing in the lottery. I don’t normally gamble: cards, horses, slots, table games, dogs, craps,… hold no attraction for me; so why play the lottery? It seems to be my only vice, I don’t drink, smoke, cheat on my wife, or carouse with a rugby team, so why?
  Coffee — You get up, wander into the kitchen, rinse out the pot, fill it with fresh water, measure out the coffee, grind it, put it into the basket, flip the switch, monitor the gurgle and hiss, enjoy the aroma, pour into the mug, spoon in the sugar, measure out the cream, stir… and then the reward… the first sip of hot, perfectly brewed, sugared, and creamed COFFEE. There is nothing better, the next sip won’t be as good, and another pot brewed later in the day will be good, but, not as good. You have to wait another whole day before you can enjoy the sensation of that first sip of coffee.
  But was it really the coffee? Could a cup of coffee be that good? Probably not. Do you remember Christmas Eve? There had to be at least one Christmas that had you excited, vibrating with anticipation. Anticipation. When that Christmas finally unfolded was it as good as the wait for it to arrive, or was it something less? Was the coffee that good, or was it the anticipation that was good?
  I buy my lottery tickets, put them in my pocket and forget about them, but every once in awhile I let my mind wander… what if? The funny thing is that winning is not part of the anticipation. I have talked with the girls at the store where I buy my tickets and always joke that I will come back and “share” with them when I win. In my mind I can see myself walking up to each in-turn and handing them an envelope with their share, watching the disbelief, the realization, the joy… I imagine myself knocking on the door where some good friends of mine live and handing them the deed for their house – paid in full, tossing them the keys to the new truck that’s parked in the driveway, and giving them the trust papers that provide them with an income for the rest of their lives. Imagine…
  Anticipation. I don’t expect that I will ever win the lottery, but I get a lot of pleasure thinking about all the great things I could do if I did win. Am I gambling? No, I’m enjoying that long anticipated first sip of coffee. I think I’ll go check my tickets. 7/18/06

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Cut The Tax Rate, Increase Revenue

  President Bush was successful in cutting the tax rate several months ago and we are now seeing the benefits in the form of substantially higher tax revenues being paid into the U.S. Government coffers. This should be a lesson for those who cannot understand this concept. Cut the tax rate (the percentage of taxes all those rich people and big corporations pay on what they earn) and earn more money (because those same rich people and big corporations were willing to put that money to work earning even more money). If you want some background on the budget, the deficit, and how taxes work please visit http://www.federalbudget.com/ .
  In the meantime, talk with all those folks who want to increase tax rates and have them try to understand that poor people with no money beyond what it takes to survive day-to-day do not drive the engine of our economy. However, rich people, who are always looking for ways to become richer, do drive that engine. We don’t have to like it, we just have to understand and appreciate the motivational factors that make the engine run and that also control its speed. Remember the old adage: “It takes money to make money.”? Like it or not, it’s true. 7/16/06

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